Archive for August, 2008

Keeping your marriage together, can happen if you resolve, restore, and inspire each other to greatness.

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This week in review:

We’ve found some great blog posts on how to save marriage that you might want to take a look at:

  • How to Fight Fair in Marriage – What kind of fighter are you? Do you bring up past hurts and grievances and hurl them at your partner, or do you simply walk away from fights, refusing to engage at all? Are you a right-fighter, always having to “win” arguments with …
  • How to Save A Marriage – How to Save A Marriage After few years of marriage some conflicts between the couples may arise and married life may become stressful. How will you come to know that your marriage is in crisis? There are some reasons responsible for …

Are you divorced or separated but still in love with your ex? There may just be hope yet. Find out how to improve communication and return to the passion you once knew.

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http://www.break-free-from-the-affair.com Marriage help for infidelity is available in this marriage help video by Dr. Huizenga, the infidelity coach, who covers the 8 stages of infidelity recovery.

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Many people wonder how to save marriage from a crisis. It’s not the easiest thing in the world to do but it can be done. Of course, you should be able to differentiate between good advice and really bad advice. You should make sure not to listen to all of the old wives’s tales that many people still believe in today. In this article we will cover a few troublesome mistakes that people will make when trying to save their marriage.

Misconception Number 1: When a person is biding their time and sitting around expecting the worst instead of getting up and going for it. Many people think that if they wait long enough, that the situation will eventually get better. You know as well as anyone else that you are just fooling yourself. You have to take charge and actually do something to save your marriage. Don’t just sit around, go for what you want and don’t hold back!

Misconception Number 2: Don’t lead the person on. If it is over, state this clearly and make the scenario very clear to the spouse. If there is no love left, just say so. Make the break clean and clear, it will hurt but it is better for everyone involved in the long run.

Misconception Number 3: Don’t make the mistake of thinking that every solution is cut and dried. This is the blunder that puts the axe in many marriages. If you are sure that there is a marriage to save then you have to be sure that you try everything in order to save it. Try to avoid making the mistake of thinking that all marriages are the same because they are not, every one is unique in it’s own way and therefore requires a unique solution to save it. There is no formula which can be used to determine if a marriage should be saved – even an affair can be overcome if you have the will and desire.

If you are positively sure of how you feel and you know that you want to be with this person and work things out then you should try as hard as you can to make it work. There will be sacrifices on both parts but as stated, it will be worth it in the long run. You’ll just have to take active steps in determining how to save marriage to make sure you don’t make any lasting mistakes.

How to Save Marriage Through CommunicationWhen your marriage is in trouble, you often look to your partner as the cause. In reality, couples should take a hard look at the relationship fundamentals when trying to figure out how to save marriage. If you’re struggling with the basics of being a couple, problems tend to intensify over time, and this can cause the type of marriage crisis that leads to thoughts or talk of divorce.

Communication is one of the biggest relationship fundamentals. Open, honest communication is a cornerstone of a strong relationship. When a couple talks about everything, without hesitation, fear, or put-downs, it brings them closer together, and they tend to go through life dealing with everything as a team. When one or both partners starts holding back, it eventually leads to resentment and stress as well as causing a rift between the partners.

Most importantly, when your partner talks, listen. Often they don’t need advice or answers — they just need a caring ear. It takes practice to listen without letting our ego step in to inject our own spin, but in order to build up your partner’s self-worth, you need to validate their opinion by just listening.

Great communication between spouses also addresses needs. If you have a need that’s not being met and you keep it to yourself, it can often lead to resentment and anger. They key is to let your spouse know what you need without it turning into an attack. The focus should be on you and your feelings. As long as they don’t feel the need to get defensive, your spouse will likely be all to happy to talk about your needs. At the same time, ask if they have any needs that aren’t being met. This way you’re working together to meet each other’s needs.

Finally, good communication can help resolve disputes. There are disagreements in any relationship. It’s important to remain calm and rational — when the volume starts increasing, it’s time to take a step back and try to figure out why. I prefer to call these situations negotiations. It helps put both people in the right frame of mind to work through the conflict. Remember, marriage is a give-and-take. It’s important to give as much as you take — if not more.

Once you begin working on improving your communication, you’ll be on the way to save a marriage.