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Be a Better Spouse Archives

The Zig Ziglar Marriage Experiment

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zig ziglar The Zig Ziglar Marriage Experiment
I heard on the news that yesterday Zig Ziglar passed away. For those who don’t know who he was, Zig was an amazing motivational speaker and writer. While he’s most often thought of as being a motivator of salespeople, during this story they played a snippet of one of his talks that seemed very appropriate for my readers.

Zig said that years ago he was giving a seminar in Birmingham and was approached by one of the participants for advice. This woman said that she was in a dead-end job full of people who constantly made her workplace miserable. She wanted Mr. Ziglar’s help on finding a better job or career.

Zig told her to take out a piece of paper and start writing down, line by line, all the things she liked about her current job. She say there wasn’t a single thing. Zig said, “you mean to tell me that there isn’t one single thing you like about your job?” She said again that there wasn’t one thing. Read the rest of this entry

3 Pieces of Advice I’d Give my 18-Year-Old Self if I Could

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18 year old self 3 Pieces of Advice Id Give my 18 Year Old Self if I Could
What if…

Last Saturday afternoon, I stopped by the mall to do a little shopping. The crowd was light since it was a beautiful day during the off season.

I wasn’t in any real hurry, so I just walked the mall, stopping by stores that looked interesting.

There were moments when it felt as if I had the whole mall to myself. As I was lost in my own thoughts, three teenage girls burst out of Spencer’s Gifts, laughing loudly.

They looked like they were dressed for some kind of retro party. They had big hair, bold makeup and clothes that looked like the early days of MTV.

I guess I was staring. One of the girls stood out from the others. She had HUGE bleach-blonde hair and these jeans with holes all over. There was something very familiar with the way she was carefully trying to be seen but make it seem as if she wasn’t trying. As she turned towards me and caught my bewildered stare, I realized why she looked so familiar.

It was me. At eighteen. Read the rest of this entry

How to Get all the Sex You Want (or How to Want All You Get)

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passion How to Get all the Sex You Want (or How to Want All You Get)
I once read about a marriage counselor who gives each partner a questionnaire before he starts their first session. One part of the survey asks about the frequency of sex in their marriage.

How often do you and your spouse have sex (circle one)?

All the time – Frequently – Average – Occasionally – Almost never – Never

How many times per week? __________________

Frequently a husband will circle “almost never,” the wife will circle “all the time,” and both will answer “2 times per week.”

Why is there often such a big gap in expectations between partners? Why are these expectations so frequently unfulfilled? What can you do about it? Read the rest of this entry

Helloooooo over there…

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canyon Helloooooo over there...
This last weekend there was a couple sitting in front of us in church.

Well, I’m guessing they were a couple.

They came in together. They left together. But they weren’t really sitting next to each other. There was room for at least two large people between them.

Both the man and the woman sat through church with folded arms. They never even turned their heads towards one another. Read the rest of this entry

Avoiding a Valentine’s Day Crash and Burn…

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Valentines Day Crash and Burn Avoiding a Valentines Day Crash and Burn...
I was chatting with a friend yesterday…

She isn’t looking forward to Valentine’s Day this year. Mostly it’s due to last year’s train wreck.

She works in an office with several other women. On Valentines Day, nearly everyone got a nice arrangement of flowers from their husband — some were gorgeous.

The day ticked by… Read the rest of this entry

How to Make My Husband Happy – Helpful Advice for Wives

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howtomakemyhusbandhappy How to Make My Husband Happy Helpful Advice for Wives
If you’re trying to figure out how to make my husband happy, one of the best ways is to laugh a lot. There is nothing worse for a husband than to be greeted by a miserable face when he comes home from work.

Before you can be happy for your husband though, you have to feel happy inside yourself. So it’s important to understand and know yourself in order to create a happy and contented home for you and your husband.

In order for you to be happy you have to enjoy the things you’re doing in your life. Work and children can take over but it’s essential you create ‘you’ time and develop your creative side. By making time to keep your hobbies alive you’ll be happier inside and it will show.

How to make my husband happy? Be affectionate

Be affectionate. There is nothing like a cuddle or a kiss to eliminate the day’s woes from your husband’s mind. If he knows he’s coming home to a loving wife and children it will cement the marriage.Keep yourself clean and attractive. Don’t let family or tiredness take away your dignity and your self esteem. Try to keep yourself looking at the very best you can so that your husband will want to be with you and can’t wait to come home.

After years of marriage this is not always easy, but it really can be achieved.

Always keep the home clean and make it a haven from the rest of the world. Keep the decor light and airy and have flowers displayed around the rooms to make them welcoming. If you can’t always afford fresh flowers, then use artificial ones and perhaps decorate them with greenery from the garden.

Take time and trouble over preparing the evening meal. A pizza is all right occasionally, but it’s hardly a romantic meal. You can plan in advance and perhaps prepare several dishes at the weekend in order to save you the time when you get home from work or from picking up the children. Think the meals through and try to choose things you know he particularly likes.

How to make my husband happy? Spend time together

Sitting eating together is important in any marriage, as you can talk over the day’s events and laugh or cry together. Talking things over and laughing at things together can make even the bad events of the day more tolerable. Laughter is very definitely the best medicine.

Sometimes it’s good to give your husband space and quiet. He doesn’t necessarily want to hear lots of girlie gossip, save that for your friends. Silence can be a sign of affection in that you are aware of his need for solitude and quiet. Respect that and leave him to relax.

When you go out together don’t make him feel embarrassed because you are talking too loud and don’t relate private things to others.

Compliment him and let him know you appreciate how hard he works for you and your family. Don’t nag him about things he hasn’t done, rather mention in a subtle way and let him end up thinking he’s remembered it himself. A simple thing no doubt, but a good way to make your husband happy.

Finally, be respectful towards your husband. Women need love in a relationship, but men need respect first. If you show him respect, the odds are he’ll show you love.

I know this advice seems like it comes from the 40′s, but being a good wife is the best first step to having your husband act like the man you want. The book, Save the Marriage, gives a step-by-step plan for rebuilding and strengthening a marriage – even if you’re the only one working on it. It explains what to do and why these things work. It’s not about reverse psychology or anything like that – it just lays out a plan for small changes you can make which will lead to making him a better husband (and a better marriage). If you’re frustrated with the way things are, I highly recommend this book. Click here for more information on how to make my husband happy…

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