Comments for How to Save Marriage http://howtosavemarriage.org Teaching Couples in Trouble How to Save Marriage Quickly and Easily Thu, 02 Feb 2012 18:16:32 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Comment on “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” by daniel son http://howtosavemarriage.org/troubled-marriage-advice/i-love-you-but-im-not-in-love-with-you/comment-page-1/#comment-236 daniel son Thu, 02 Feb 2012 18:16:32 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=439#comment-236 Bree> {removed some strong words -M}. I feel sorry for your husband and your children. Once a tramp.. Bree> {removed some strong words -M}. I feel sorry for your husband and your children. Once a tramp..

]]> Comment on The Most Important Step to Take To End Your Spouse’s Affair! by admin http://howtosavemarriage.org/save-your-marriage/the-most-important-step-to-take-to-end-your-spouses-affair/comment-page-1/#comment-234 admin Thu, 02 Feb 2012 05:37:58 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=315#comment-234 @Ashiley, From reading this comment and your other one in the other post, I strongly suspect that your husband is having an affair. I recommend installing a keylogger on his computer and/or putting a voice-activated recorder in his car. If you need advice on where to find these items, sign up for my free report over on the right hand side of any page. Don't confront him again until you have hard evidence - again, there's more advice in the report. I'm sorry you're here. I've been there before myself. It stinks. @Ashiley,

From reading this comment and your other one in the other post, I strongly suspect that your husband is having an affair.

I recommend installing a keylogger on his computer and/or putting a voice-activated recorder in his car. If you need advice on where to find these items, sign up for my free report over on the right hand side of any page.

Don’t confront him again until you have hard evidence – again, there’s more advice in the report.

I’m sorry you’re here. I’ve been there before myself.

It stinks.

]]> Comment on The Most Important Step to Take To End Your Spouse’s Affair! by ashiley http://howtosavemarriage.org/save-your-marriage/the-most-important-step-to-take-to-end-your-spouses-affair/comment-page-1/#comment-233 ashiley Wed, 01 Feb 2012 21:16:44 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=315#comment-233 i think my husband is cheating on me because there were a few time he went out with this specific girl witch is his friend they got drunk and he did not come home till the next morning but when i asked him next morning.he said he never cheated on me but my concious is telling me other wise. i have told him time and time again let me talk to her myself and let me see what happend that night he told me no. he lied to me times and titmes again on what happend that night and i feel like i cant move forward with my merriage until i know what really happend that night. im on the verge of getting a divorce and not caring on how this affects him . because if he cared in the first place then he would have never did it in the begging. what kind of husband/father goes out with a friend of the opposite sex gets drunk and dont come home till the next morning. somebody please give me some advice i need to know what should my actions be. i dont want to lose my family because i still love him but maybe its for the best. i think my husband is cheating on me because there were a few time he went out with this specific girl witch is his friend they got drunk and he did not come home till the next morning but when i asked him next morning.he said he never cheated on me but my concious is telling me other wise. i have told him time and time again let me talk to her myself and let me see what happend that night he told me no. he lied to me times and titmes again on what happend that night and i feel like i cant move forward with my merriage until i know what really happend that night. im on the verge of getting a divorce and not caring on how this affects him . because if he cared in the first place then he would have never did it in the begging. what kind of husband/father goes out with a friend of the opposite sex gets drunk and dont come home till the next morning. somebody please give me some advice i need to know what should my actions be. i dont want to lose my family because i still love him but maybe its for the best.

]]> Comment on My Husband Seems Distant. What Does This Mean? by ashiley http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-a-marriage/my-husband-seems-distant-what-does-this-mean/comment-page-1/#comment-232 ashiley Wed, 01 Feb 2012 21:02:01 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=533#comment-232 i dont think my husband loves me anymore. when he comes home from work he has this attitude like why am i here or i wish i couldive stayed later at work. soon as he comes home hes either on facebook, or on the phone with his best friend or playstation. when he walks in the door he kisses me then greets his daughter plays with her for about 5 minutes and then goes on with his day as if were not even here like we dont exist to him. i confronted the situation many times before but i feel like im not getting threw to him. im on the verge of getting a divorce. im not happy in this relationship anymore. i feel like i need space but he refuse to give it to mee. i dont think my husband loves me anymore. when he comes home from work he has this attitude like why am i here or i wish i couldive stayed later at work. soon as he comes home hes either on facebook, or on the phone with his best friend or playstation. when he walks in the door he kisses me then greets his daughter plays with her for about 5 minutes and then goes on with his day as if were not even here like we dont exist to him. i confronted the situation many times before but i feel like im not getting threw to him. im on the verge of getting a divorce. im not happy in this relationship anymore. i feel like i need space but he refuse to give it to mee.

]]> Comment on How to Make My Husband Happy – Helpful Advice for Wives by admin http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-marriage/how-to-make-my-husband-happy-helpful-advice-for-wives/comment-page-1/#comment-229 admin Tue, 31 Jan 2012 14:34:58 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=102#comment-229 @Cher, It takes two. That's for sure. It's great that you see your part in making your marriage work. :) Congratulations on making it through your first 29! @Cher,

It takes two. That’s for sure.

It’s great that you see your part in making your marriage work. :)

Congratulations on making it through your first 29!

]]> Comment on How to Make My Husband Happy – Helpful Advice for Wives by Cher http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-marriage/how-to-make-my-husband-happy-helpful-advice-for-wives/comment-page-1/#comment-228 Cher Tue, 31 Jan 2012 08:23:50 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=102#comment-228 What a find. A cute site. After having a pitty party for me once again. This Sunday we will have been married 29 years. Raised two boys and are empty nesters. However the intimacy in our marriage left years ago, I have tried to hang in there and stay together. Lately though, the kisses and I love you's have gone too. As I ended my pitty party, it dawned on me that I have not been the easiest one to live with and I need to work at it and make him happy. That led me to your site. Thank you. What a find. A cute site. After having a pitty party for me once again. This Sunday we will have been married 29 years. Raised two boys and are empty nesters. However the intimacy in our marriage left years ago, I have tried to hang in there and stay together. Lately though, the kisses and I love you’s have gone too. As I ended my pitty party, it dawned on me that I have not been the easiest one to live with and I need to work at it and make him happy. That led me to your site. Thank you.

]]> Comment on Your Husband – How Do You Know If He Still Loves You? by admin http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-marriage/your-husband-how-do-you-know-if-he-still-loves-you/comment-page-1/#comment-227 admin Mon, 30 Jan 2012 15:04:16 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=95#comment-227 @Megan Very insightful reply. That is certainly a possibility, too. Unresolved guilt can have a powerful effect on a person and a marriage. Thanks for chiming in! @Megan

Very insightful reply. That is certainly a possibility, too.

Unresolved guilt can have a powerful effect on a person and a marriage.

Thanks for chiming in!

]]> Comment on Your Husband – How Do You Know If He Still Loves You? by Megan http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-marriage/your-husband-how-do-you-know-if-he-still-loves-you/comment-page-1/#comment-226 Megan Mon, 30 Jan 2012 08:41:55 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=95#comment-226 @OMG I see a lot of women wanting more affection and effort on their husbands part, but are not willing to give the effort back. Why is smiling at your husband and greeting him when he comes home giving him a "fake smile." So because you've had a bad day, you cant show happiness to see your husband? Being chronically ill, I have a LOT of crappy, very difficult days. But that does not mean I'm faking it when I greet my husband. I am happy to see him. Affection towards your spouse should not be dependent on how your day went. Make the time for each other, even when life is hard. I also feel the attitude that your problems at home, with your children are more difficult than anything your husband goes through during his day, is detrimental. That type of self-centered attitude will hurt any relationship, not just marriages. Your struggles are different than his. Some days he will have had the worse day, other days you will. Its dangerous to go around thinking you have it worse than the people around you. Its a big pity party and will leave you bitter and your spouse unappreciated. Most husbands who have the job of being the financial providers, take the responsibility of caring for their families very deeply. Sometimes the pressure is undeniably horrible! That pressure will only get worse if his wife doesn't even appreciate his work or thinks he has it so much easier than her. If he doesn't feel he's making his family happy, or doing a good job, he will feel guilty. Guilt is torturous. I think you should attempt to get out of your own struggles and your own day, and recognize its not all about you. Maybe if you take the time to be interested in your husband and appreciate his struggles, he will return the favor. Obviously that is not something you feel the need to do. @OMG

I see a lot of women wanting more affection and effort on their husbands part, but are not willing to give the effort back. Why is smiling at your husband and greeting him when he comes home giving him a “fake smile.” So because you’ve had a bad day, you cant show happiness to see your husband? Being chronically ill, I have a LOT of crappy, very difficult days. But that does not mean I’m faking it when I greet my husband. I am happy to see him. Affection towards your spouse should not be dependent on how your day went. Make the time for each other, even when life is hard.

I also feel the attitude that your problems at home, with your children are more difficult than anything your husband goes through during his day, is detrimental. That type of self-centered attitude will hurt any relationship, not just marriages. Your struggles are different than his. Some days he will have had the worse day, other days you will. Its dangerous to go around thinking you have it worse than the people around you. Its a big pity party and will leave you bitter and your spouse unappreciated. Most husbands who have the job of being the financial providers, take the responsibility of caring for their families very deeply. Sometimes the pressure is undeniably horrible! That pressure will only get worse if his wife doesn’t even appreciate his work or thinks he has it so much easier than her. If he doesn’t feel he’s making his family happy, or doing a good job, he will feel guilty. Guilt is torturous.

I think you should attempt to get out of your own struggles and your own day, and recognize its not all about you. Maybe if you take the time to be interested in your husband and appreciate his struggles, he will return the favor. Obviously that is not something you feel the need to do.

]]> Comment on Your Husband – How Do You Know If He Still Loves You? by Megan http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-marriage/your-husband-how-do-you-know-if-he-still-loves-you/comment-page-1/#comment-225 Megan Mon, 30 Jan 2012 08:28:39 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=95#comment-225 @Cherry, Actually I have a slightly different view on your situation. While others have mentioned he seems like he's not remorseful, I'd like to offer the possibility that maybe his guilt is so strong, he doesnt feel like he can deal with it. 2 years ago my husband and I were downtown and he got obliterated drunk. I caught him making out with another woman. He was so drunk he didnt even realize what was happening. We went through the same thing you're going through. He was watching a lot of porn, our sex life suffered, and anytime I brought it up he got defensive and angry. It took a long time but finally he broke down and said that he just couldn't believe he would do that to me and he didnt know how to handle it. His guilt was so overpowering he turned into a big jerk, instead of handling the issue. He had a hard time talking because he didnt want to see my disappointment in him. He had a hard time being intimate with me, because he felt he had let me down and didnt deserve sex with me. He became depressed. We've worked through it and have an amazing relationship now. Perhaps a way to get him to listen to your feelings on the matter, is to ask him how he feels about it. Ask him what he thinks should happen and how he is feeling. Remind him that you love him and you want to work through this, not punish him. And then listen. @Cherry,
Actually I have a slightly different view on your situation. While others have mentioned he seems like he’s not remorseful, I’d like to offer the possibility that maybe his guilt is so strong, he doesnt feel like he can deal with it. 2 years ago my husband and I were downtown and he got obliterated drunk. I caught him making out with another woman. He was so drunk he didnt even realize what was happening. We went through the same thing you’re going through. He was watching a lot of porn, our sex life suffered, and anytime I brought it up he got defensive and angry. It took a long time but finally he broke down and said that he just couldn’t believe he would do that to me and he didnt know how to handle it. His guilt was so overpowering he turned into a big jerk, instead of handling the issue. He had a hard time talking because he didnt want to see my disappointment in him. He had a hard time being intimate with me, because he felt he had let me down and didnt deserve sex with me. He became depressed. We’ve worked through it and have an amazing relationship now. Perhaps a way to get him to listen to your feelings on the matter, is to ask him how he feels about it. Ask him what he thinks should happen and how he is feeling. Remind him that you love him and you want to work through this, not punish him. And then listen.

]]> Comment on How to Make My Husband Happy? Love is a Verb! by admin http://howtosavemarriage.org/how-to-save-a-marriage/how-to-make-my-husband-happy-love-is-a-verb/comment-page-1/#comment-222 admin Fri, 27 Jan 2012 16:29:03 +0000 http://howtosavemarriage.org/?p=329#comment-222 @Ashley, I appreciate the feedback! My goal is to help people, and it really makes me feel good when I hit the mark. :) @Ashley,

I appreciate the feedback! My goal is to help people, and it really makes me feel good when I hit the mark. :)

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